How to Refer to an Ex-spouse When Kids Are Involved

For North Carolina parents, going through a divorce can be difficult especially if the split was not amicable. In many cases, parents can have difficulty dealing with their children’s other parent if they cannot agree on how to best co-parent. This can even extend to how parents refer to the other when around the kids.

Many parents refer to their former spouse as an “ex.” However, this can be difficult for the kids to understand. An “ex” essentially refers to something that is no longer a part of a person’s life. By calling a former spouse an “ex,” the children may not understand that the other person still has a valuable place in their lives. Instead, parents should refer to their former spouse as the child’s mother or father.

Referring to the other parent by their name or status as a parent can be difficult due to the fact that most people call their former partners “ex.” Changing this habit can take some practice. While not referring to their previous spouse an “ex” seems like a small thing, children do absorb negative feelings between both of their parents. By referring to a former spouse positively, the kids generally benefit.

When two parents decide to get a divorce, the court usually assumes that both parents will have joint custody of the children unless there is evidence a parent may not be able to properly care for the kids. If the parents intend to co-parent, a family law attorney may help a parent negotiate a visitation schedule that allows them to maintain a strong relationship with the children. If a parent wants sole custody because the other parent cannot care for the kids, an attorney may provide evidence to strengthen the parent’s case in court.

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